Luisona day

Today comes the celebration of "Bar Sport" a satiric cult-book by Stefano Benni telling about a typical Italian cafe (not such the one you can encounter as a tourist). More in detail the Luisona day is dedicated to "Luisona" (sounds like "Big Lucy") a mythical pastry exposed in a showcase of the cafe.
I'd like to pay tribute to Luisona with this homemade translation (Benni please forgive me!) of the book excerpt that introduce it :
At the bar Sport nobody eats nothing. There is a showcase with pastries, but it is purely choreographic. They are ornamental pastries, often rare pieces of handicraft. That pastries are exposed since several years and habitual customers know them one by one. When one of these customer comes in he says: “The meringa is a little tired today. It could be due to warmth”. Or: “It's time to dust the krapfen”. Rarely, the occasional customer dares to approach the shrine. Once, as an example, a sales representative of Milan entered the cafe. It opened the showcase and put in his mouth a big black and white pastry sprayed with wonderful hard-steel grains that mark only truly bad pastries. After a short time in the bar the rumors raised: “Someone ate Luisona!”. Luisona was the dean of pastries,the more aged one and it was exposed in the showcase since 1959. Watching the color of its cream elderly men used to formulate weather forecasts. Its departure shocked everyone. The salesman was invited to exit with the greatest contempt. Nobody touched him, because everyone knew that his insane act just came with the most tremendous punishment. In fact the salesman was found just an hour later, in the toilette of a roadside cafe of Modena, he was sick due to excruciating pain. Luisona had its revenge!. In fact, the main particularity of these pastries is their not so easy digestion. When the pastry is ingested, first of all steel grains perforate the esophagus. Then, when the pastry arrives to the liver, this one analyzes it and renounces to work on it, moving suddenly on the left and let the pastry to pass by. The pastry, still entire, covers the intestine and falls untouched on the ground after a few seconds. If the bartender isn't watching, you can also put again the pastry in the showcase and go away.

The celebration is worldwide, here's the list of places where it has been organized a lecture, a party, a ceremony or whatever to remember the mythical Luisona :
http://www.stefanobenni.it/luisona/